Last month, March 8 came around again and marked five years since John went to heaven. Five years is a long time to miss someone you love. Years ago, in our early days of dating and marriage, I feared losing John. I couldn't imagine life without him. The thought of experiencing a loss that great … Continue reading He Loves Us Back to Life
grief
Daring to Dream Again
Well, we are at the end of the first month of this new year and resolutions aren't quite as shiny. I don't typically make many new year resolutions. Since John died, my resolutions have been simple: "I am resolved, with God's sustaining grace, to keep putting one foot in front of the other for 365 … Continue reading Daring to Dream Again
Travel Therapy
In the early months after John's death, I would have a Forrest Gump urge to start walking across the country, never stopping until my toes were in the chilly waters of the Pacific. Or, I'd daydream about driving, driving, driving across the country on an endless road trip in an endless summer. Chasing that glorious … Continue reading Travel Therapy
Thanksgiving Thoughts
Happy Thanksgiving to You & Your Families! I am thankful for you new friends. I know some of you but many of you are new to me this Thanksgiving. Your geography is vast- all over the world, which means turkey and cranberries and family may not be part of your day. But, whoever you are … Continue reading Thanksgiving Thoughts
Speaking Honestly about Grief
Grief is a riddle. What is invisible to everyone else, but you can't escape? Grief. It is awkward to be a mourner disguised in normalcy. I think that maybe our culture shouldn't have discarded the tradition of wearing black during the first few months of mourning. I wouldn't have minded it because it would have made … Continue reading Speaking Honestly about Grief
A Story with a Different Ending
Jay and Katherine Wolf are on the other side of our story. In 2008 Katherine had a catastrophic brain stem stroke, very similar to John's, but she survived. She was 26 years old and the young mom of a 6 month old baby boy. Their story is heartbreaking and inspiring. Jay's commitment to love and Katherine's willingness … Continue reading A Story with a Different Ending
Grace & Grief Meet
Over the next few days, we pieced together what had happened to John. It was a beautiful spring afternoon, and he stopped by the university on his way home to go for a run. Security camera videos show him walking out of the gym into brilliant afternoon sunlight. Several people saw him on the jogging … Continue reading Grace & Grief Meet
The Day Life Changed
John had disappeared. For several hours we had been trying to retrace his steps. I knew something was very wrong because he left his downtown office late in the afternoon but never came home for dinner. It had been one of those teamwork nights for us: me at a meeting, him planning to come home from … Continue reading The Day Life Changed
Our Story: A Preface
You are brave. Really. Because I know our story is uncomfortable. It is everyone’s nightmare and awakens all kinds of fears that lurk in your mind. I understand because I used to be afraid of people like me and their stories. So, I don’t take your willingness to venture close for granted. From the outside … Continue reading Our Story: A Preface
A Journey of 2 1/2 Years
Today it has been two and a half years since I ate breakfast with John and our kids, kissed him at the door, and watched him walk to his car: shoulders full of briefcase, lunch, dry cleaning, and gym bag. Such an ordinary day. Little did we know we were saying goodbye. In the early … Continue reading A Journey of 2 1/2 Years